||17 Mar 2015 2:37 am
|Reviewer: Anonymous (Anonymous)
That was an interesting story. You've got a good beginning. I would've liked more background and more detail.
How did Bellatrix and Severus become a couple? Did she ever marry LeStrange? Did Severus ever get over Lily? Was this a marriage of love or convenience?
Did James and Lily know? How did Hermione's parents react? They raised her for 13 years. I would assume they would still want to be in her life. How did Sirius react? Remus? Ron?
How did Voldemort rise again? How exactly did they defeat Voldemort? What was the potion? I had assumed it was some type of blood adoption potion. How did Voldemort find out their true identities?
A suggestion to make it easier to read: instead of having 10 chapters that are 150 to 400 words each, have it be a one-shot. At max, it should be 2 chapters of about 1,500 words.
One more thing: It's not "Wormwood". It's Wormtail.
OOps, I will change that.
It was just meant to get me back into writing, and I just wanted short, mini chapters, for it to not feel to overwhelming, but I still needed the break to set up the chain of events. Hee hee. Wormwood. where the heck did I get that from. lol. Oh, wait. Matilda! That must be where. lol