Reviews For Relevance
Who is saying this?
“He was old enough to know what he was doing-”
“And you should be old enough to know not to get involved in all of this business!”
It's hard to tell. Is it the Dursleys? As a flashback?
And who is he talking about here?
“I think abuse is a really strong word for the situation at hand. And I know, I know, everyone who’s abused says that but like, it’s… I mean they care about me and they don’t try to hurt me.
Is Harry talking about the Dursley here? Did they care about Harry? They did try to hurt Harry mentally, all the time with his pitiful birthday presents and leaving him behind when going out, forcing him to wear hand-me-downs, and making him live in a cupboard, right?
Some typos missed:
Snape’s quil snapped.
Uncle Vernon rolls his eyes. “You shouldn’t have given yours
Harry’s force grip on his pen his so harsh he rips the paper of his journal,
pen IS so harsh
He can not get the words to exit his mouth, even as Aunt Petunia runs his fingers through his hair. runs HER fingers through his hair.
“Keep up with me, do you?” Ginny smirked.
“I can’t help that they keep the same schedule as my favorite team,” Harry shrugged.
Did you mean, “I can’t help that YOU keep the same schedule as my favorite team"?
And then when Snape showed up at the Weasleys?! AHHHH! That was SOOOO unexpected! And just to check on Harry. That is so sweet. It's like Snape cares. Does having Harry under his employ make Snape feel even more responsible for him?
Snape is being so understanding in this story. I absolutely love it. Empathetic language and validation and all.
Harry's humor is intact and spot-on. The part about being a pothead was hilarious. I loved Snape warning him, and making him go back to the castle.
There are so many clever things in this story. So many great descriptions. The emotions and pace are spot on.
The content matter is very difficult to experience in real life. You absolutely are right and I hope that you had a Snape in your life to tell you so.
EMDR therapy would really help this too. It helps reprocess traumatic events and it feels like it either shrinks or fades them away, or allows them to be returned to the bookcase and not constantly being reopened in front of your face. I highly recommend you try it. I did it and it really helped the memories I reprocessed.
I don't normally give out scores of 10, but you got one.
I hope writing this story and the explanation has helped in a small way.
Take care and love yourself you are a fantastic writer and person.
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