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Reviews For Lily's Charm: The Gift
"The soap felt gritty, as though there were layers of grime on his skin. His entire body seemed to be covered in invisible dirt. And no matter how hard he scrubbed the white soap over and over, he wouldn’t come clean. It was as though he would never be clean again…" **This, coupled with the image of Harry leaning his forehead against the wall of the shower had so much unspoken emotion packed into those few words. So awesome :) And of course I loved the Sev's stern insistance that Harry "Get up" when he's feeling disoriented. Yay for Harry obeying without question! I just love those little moments of father/son expectance. The part about Severus missing so much in Harry's life, including the first time he was disciplined just made me choke up. The fact that something so everyday, seemingly insignificant, would affect Severus that way just tore my heart out... *facepalms* And of course, Harry's reassurance that Severus isn't 'acting' as his father, but truly *is* his father was just beautiful. And you have a way of conveying that emotion without overdoing it. I love it. It would be so easy to just cornball this relationship up, and you simply don't do it. It's very believable. And I think Severus' calm tenderness toward Harry is very spot-on if he were to actually *be* Harry's father. Of course, we don't know these things for certain, but I think you've interpreted it very well. Go you. ;) And finally, the subtle humor that just revolves around the two of them is perfect. I love that too. Well, obviously I love a crap-load of things about this story. But seriously, how else can I describe it but with looooove? *swoons* Okay. Anyway. I've said it before, but the sternness and Severus' customary calmness were balanced really well. He seems to explain things to Harry in terms that he understands, such as pointing out that if Harry wants him to take his concern seriously, then he has to present in a way that isn't agressive and childish, though, you know how much I love Harry's 'childish side' when it emerges. lol. I just adore that Harry's character flawed and realistic in this story. A Harry with superpowers is swell, but let's face it: very difficult to relate to. Well, you've done it again. And I know you mentioned that this chapter was a pain in the butt, but seriously, it didn't show through in your writing at all. It was as smooth and touching as always. Totally and completely bril. (I'm a Brit-wanna-be, can you tell?" Author's Response: You know the other day when you wrote something to me, I was thinking: wow, she's sorta being British. LOL I do that as well. Hee hee. Harry's anger is not really about Sev here, you're right. He is dealing with too much, just as Sev's anger is not really directed at Harry. They both have issues. Let's face. Staring down the barrel of evil can't really be a good experience. LOL And Harry feels very tainted by what's happened to him. He's realizing what it really means to have held part of Voldy's soul in him for all those years. He just feels like it marked him. Brrrr. I'm glad you enjoyed the shower scene (LOL..that sounds dirty). I think water is such a powerful emotional force. It denotes so many things and Harry in that shower was vulnerable and that's really how he's feeling right now. Sev as well, as he's having a hard time coming to terms with everything, especially with all that Voldemort so kindly brought up again. Poor Boys. I was actually thinking of you a lot when I was writing stern Sev. I already had some of it done but you were the one who was so excited about stern Sev and I know how much you love him. :oP So, I'm glad you liked him here. I just enjoy writing them attempting to just be father and adolescent son. It's fun to do. And (hee hee) I'm glad you think these two are not too cornball. I try to make them as in character as I can. ;o) And I think I've sadi it before but I think Severus here acts very much with Harry how he did with Lily. Calm tenderness is perfect just like you said. And though he's not always consciously trying to do it, he's trying to make up for everything he feels he is responsible for, every sin he's comitted concerning Harry...and even Lily. So that's what he's trying to convey to Harry. He's trying to be his dad; he doesn't really know how but he's trying. Swooning...LOL I do know how much you love childish Harry. I do as well. I think teenagers are basically childish adults. If that makes sense... So he has his moments and even Sev has his. They are father and son, after all. Oh yeah, these two are very definitely flawed. This chapter was a pain in the butt, but glad you couldn't really tell how hard it was. LOL And thanks! Hope you're feeling better and when can I get me some SFS love? !!
If that can't happen, Poppy should put them both in a body bind and pour dreamless sleep down their throats. A few days of sleep without nightmares will do wonders. In a recent study on sleep, ten healthy college students participated in a sleep study. They were not allowed to sleep except about 4 hours each night. At the end, all were in terrible shape plus they were in a pre diabetic condition. Sleep is vastly underestimated. Author's Response: LOL Yep it is...especially as Severus puts absolutely no stock in his own need for sleep. Their sleep deprivation explains a lot of their behavior right now. A vacation does sound good, doesn't it. And don't worry, if Severus doesn't do as he's told, Poppy WILL intervene, make no mistake. That lady does not make idle threats. And you're right...they both are in shock. But moreover, both of them are grieving. Sev for Lily again, and now for James as well. Everything that tortured Sev is haunting him again. He didn't even begin to explain to Harry all that is bothering him. Voldemort brought to the forefront of their minds, some terrible things. Harry is remembering too much pain. It will only get worse, before it gets better. Thanks for reviewing and for understanding the angst of all that sleep deprivation brings. :o(
" The smooth spheres winked at him…the small orbs cool against his skin, like the ice had been against his storm…the chips of Voldemort…Harry fingers dug around the stones as a wave of dizziness washed through him. He grabbed at the floor for support, but its smooth surface offered little assistance. He could feel himself falling and the void was so immense..." He could feel himself falling and the void was so intense, *shudders*, if that's how he reacts to something as small as a gobstone in the quiet of his room, it can't take much to send him over the edge completely, i also liked the way you alluded to his state of mind in the shower 'scrubbing as though to get himself clean, but he could never be clean enough'. Lack of sleep isn't the cause, and he knows it, do both of them know it? Severus must have an idea that something deeper is going on with Harry. I wonder what he would do if he knew how bad it actually is? Thanks again for the wonderful chapter, eloquent as always. :) Author's Response: LOL Well, you know it's gonna happen one of these times...going over the edge I mean. :oP It wouldn't be LC, without someone going round the bed. Hee hee. Severus is very concerned about Harry; he can feel the emotions Harry is feeling but he is feeling similarly on his own with what he went through and right now, he's having a very hard time separating what's wrong with Harry and what he feels on his own. I'm glad you liked the shower part. Harry really feels tainted by what happened. It was too much evil. His soul was coated. Ick. And Brrrr.... Thanks for reviewing. I'm so happy you enjoyed. :o)
Okay, but back to the beginning. Things that jumped out at me that will cause the purple pondering hat to be placed upon my head: "His movements continued to be jerky as he undressed" (Is something wrong with Harry other than just sleep deprivation?) "It was as though he would never be clean again…" (Poor Harry. Just post traumatic stress from Voldy almost stealing his soul or something else?) Harry's mood swings, as noted by Hermione. Could just be exhaustion, or post-stress, or something else? OE makes me suspect every single line anymore. Geesh. Don't stop, of course, I love it... "He could feel himself falling and the void was so immense…" (Okay, don't tell me that wasn't ominous as all heck because it was. Brrr....) And what was Severus reaction to that all about? Was it just anger because Harry kept saying he was fine when he wasn't? I'm not sure Harry realizes he's not fine, and I thought Sev was a bit over the top there. Worry I expected, but not anger. Which tells me that Severus is as bad a mess as Harry. Our poor Snapes... Poppy taking Severus to task was a riot. I just love that witch. She's not afraid of anything. I think she should have taken down Voldemort. Nobody can defy her. And I so dearly loved Severus' and Harry's talk. When they connect on that level, they give me some of my favorite moments of LC. Severus gave me a big lump in my throat when he admitted his nightmare to Harry. How could he NOT have nightmares about having come to close to losing Harry? And Severus telling Harry it was not part of his role as his son to take care of his dad made me want to slap him (in a playful way, of course.) Severus just can't get his brain around people loving him still, can he? That it will always go both ways - the worry and the care. And Harry standing his ground over that fact was downright adorable. I sure hope they sleep tonight. Poppy can sneak in and hex them to their beds if they don't. Not that I think sleep is the answer to Harry's issues completely. I still suspect something's off there. The hug...hmmmm....has to go to Severus. He actually said YES to Remus request that he take part at the wedding. That can't have been easy on the poor guy. And maybe after a hug he'll go to sleep. But after he hexes me for hugging him in the first place. Ah, OE, you just don't lose your touch. How *do* you do that? I continue my "in aweness" of you (I know it's not grammatically correct. Don't care. Hee hee). Author's Response: Oh I definitely think Severus is grouchier. Remember though, he is experiencing the full breadth of what Harry is feeling as well as dealing with his own emotions. He can pretty well keep his own emotions from seeping into Harry's but Harry can't return the favor and Seriously, Severus hasn't had any sleep in 2 nights. He didn't sleep the night before either. He's got some sleep deprivation going on. Yes, something is wrong with Harry. "It was as though he would never be clean again…"--That's bascially about the idea that Harry feels tainted by Voldemort. Overwhelmed still by his presence entangled with his soul Hee hee. You SHOULD suspect every line. Something fishy is going on here. Severus IS a a mess. This was more a case of daddy is just plain irrascible from lack of sleep, as well as the old problem of his worry turning to anger. He's really worried about Harry. And he just danced with Voldemort in a battle that nearly lost him his son. It took waaaaaaay more effort for him to bring Harry away and turn Voldemort to the depths than it took for Harry. Severus was the major source of strenght there, plus he wasn't even ALL in the void. Part of him was left behind so it just means it was all the more effort to do what he did in the void. The man's on the brink of a collapse. He, just like Harry, deserves his tetchiness. And it doesn't help that Harry is being snappish as all get out. Those two need a time out. LOL I love Poppy. She's great. Severus had a nightmare. A chilling one and he's having a very hard time being awake and not thinking about what happened. Nope, Sev can't accept that he is capable of being loved. That Harry cares about him. Poor man's been scarred too much to every really accept it so readily. Sleep won't cure what's ailing Harry, but it sure will make their day go smoother without the two of them snarking at each other. Severus DOES need a hug. Maybe he'll get one next chapter. ;o) Thanks, Cathy. Glad you enjoyed the chapter. And thanks for your review, as always. :o)
Author's Response: Oh, good! I'm glad you found the sequel. Thanks so much for all your kind reviews. :o)
Starting the sequel with seeing the location of the house Godric Hollow at a moment in time when Severus and Lily were deliriously happy and then seeing it suddenly through Harry's eyes in its destruction was jarring, sad and frankly, brilliant on your part. I bow to your prowess as a writer. The dialogue between Harry and Severus just continues to flow so easily, and is so darn believable the way you pen it. Harry's struggle to come to terms with the events of the last 24 hours and Severus' inability to answer some of his questions (as to why James and Lily didn't allow him to pass) becomes our frustration too. Of course, we want to know as well! It's almost like I can "be" Harry when I read it, because you just write it so well. Man, you're brilliant. (I'm wondering how many times I can use the word "brilliant" in one review.) And as well as Harry's feelings, I got swallowed in Severus' as well when they visited the gravesites. His grief coming to the surface when Harry made that face which reminded him of Lily, and this sentence just killed me: "They were standing in front of the graves of the only two people, besides Harry, that Severus had ever loved." That did it...I was emotionally slayed. And it continued to kill me through the whole scene of them kneeling on those graves. Incredibly raw and powerful, it was. HOW do you do that? I wish I could hex every reporter that showed up and ruined that moment. Rita Skeeter's on top of the hit list. And I loved Severus admitting to Harry he was about to lose control right there; quite telling of his current headspace I think. Speaking of headspaces, clearly neither of our two favorite guys are in good shape here following their close and way too personal encounter with Voldemort. Of course we wouldn't expect them to be. Dancing and throwing the butterbeer party immediately afterward would be terribly suspect and make me think they'd gone nutters. But it's HOW you are depicting their current states I find fascinating. It's subtle, their mood shifts with each other and nothing we can put our fingers on (yet.) We just know not all is well in their little world and the unease and tension is downright palpable. Again, brilliant writing. (I'm up to four aren't I?) I keep pondering this part: "And again, Harry felt the drowning, suffocating sensation he had felt at the Riddle House." My ponderings have left me nowhere, but this is ominous in the first degree. Makes me shiver *brrrrr*. Because Severus reacted so strongly to Harry's state at that moment and demanded answers makes me wonder what *Severus* feels when Harry goes there. I'm probably overthinking this, but with this reaction from Severus: "You defeated Voldemort, just as much as I did. There is no Darkness in you. You are too good.” As you said, he said it with strong conviction and with more emotion than Harry had ever heard from him. Was it just that he was trying to make Harry believe it, or was he trying to convince himself as well? I think Severus is suspicious about *something* which is why he is so adament about Harry seeing Poppy. And I wish Poppy would just bodybind both those boys to bed and cast a Somnus spell and make them sleep for 48 hours. Dang, they need it, the grouches! They are certainly entitled to *be* grouches after what they've been through, but I love it when Poppy plays tough with them, hee hee. Those two worry about each other so much they just might suffocate each other. Us readers just love it though, the way you brilliantly write their interactions and we wouldn't have it any other way. Harry being a teenager and Sev trying his best to father him and being rusty at it. Love, love, love it. I await the next "brilliant" chapter (I'm up to six) with baited breath because I am terrilby worried about both guys and I'm wondering what Poppy will find (if anything). Who gets the first hug of "The Gift"? Harry is in the running, but I think he's going to need lots down the road so he'll have to wait. I give it to you, OE, for an amazing, tantalizing, and yes, "brilliant" first chapter. I know I gave you the ending one of the previous story, but that's okay. One can never have enough hugs, can they? :-) Author's Response: Yeah, it was sorta sad, wasn't it? To see the hope of all that could have been and then the decimation of what was. That's what this story is all about. Opposites...coming to terms with the wants and realities of life. Sev was about to lose it and he continues to be about to lose it. And yeah, Skeeter needs to be dealt with and she will be...don't worry. Nope, neither one of them is doing well at all. Both were very affected by what happened in the void. And Severus' even worse because no one's gonna force him to talk through it and if the man won't sleep, well there's more than meets the eye with that as well.
Well, Poppy's up next so we shall see what she has to say about it. But somehow, I really enjoy a grouchy Sev and Harry. hee hee. LOL They indeed may just suffocate each other. And Severus is way too rusty, isn't he. And with both of them being cranky, it makes a bad combination. I love writing it though. :oP
Author's Response: Nope, Voldy's been banished. All of him. ;o) Sev and Harry do have a lot of concern for each other, unfortunately Harry doesn't quite know how to express that. LOL Poor kid. Trying to take care of his father. And yeah, somebody should step on skeeter, but don't worry. She will be dealt with...eventually. :o)
I'm amazed at how balanced you keep everything in the story. Sev and Harry are continually plagued by the memory of Voldemort, but there are happy moments there too, when Sev shares a memory of Lily or gets lost in one himself. The winter air chills them as they walk through Godric's Hollow, but the sun provides its warmth too. Comparing the empty shell of the past to the fullness of the future. The frightening image of Death Eaters arriving at the cemetary being just as vicious but less dangerous reporters. The worry Harry expresses over his father in addition to the irritation at how he's taking care of himself. Sev thanking Lily and James for their sacrifice, as does Harry for the person kneeling next to him by their graves. Sev's comparing Harry to Lily while being sure he's still his own person. Harry acting like a teenager beyond his years as well as a four year old. Like I said, lots of balance. And that's amazing. Hmm...there's a lot of foreshadowing? Oh dear, I better look through this again. Ok, so maybe this leads to some type of foreshadowing, but what was up with Voldemort's body being blackened and shriveled? I'm pretty sure that the Charm didn't do that to him, or did it? Sev's remark kinda makes it seem as though it was meant to, or was he merely referring to Voldie's death as "going as planned". Hmm...but Harry didn't seem to remember the state Voldie was in, and neither do I, for that matter. Perhaps a trip to the Headmaster's office is in order? And, now my memory is being sucked away from me by stupid professors, so I apologize, but did Harry visit with Schridgemore (sp?) yet? I assume that's coming up next then. Along with more angst and awkward silences between friends...that should be interesting! And I hope that Sev and Harry get over whatever's going on between them (I'm not sure they even know what's going on) and that they don't at the same time. Is that bad? Geez. You've officially hooked me. Thanks. More addictions to obsess over. But, this is a great 'angle' to be exploring. My question is, will either of these guys, aka Harry, ever think/believe that they were getting along so well before (and aren't now) because of their common need for Snake Face to be ousted? And now that he's gone, that they will go back to their separate lives without the other? Not saying that I want them to go this far, but it kinda seems like a plausible guilt thing that Harry would do. (Trying on my new Psychology Hat I got this weekend. It's a little tight.) Hmm...I'm also expecting Remus to pop in for a tic. That'd be fun...with news of his engagement. And for Sev to be all, "ok, what does this have to do with me?" "Well, Severus, the truth is...I'd-well, I would appreciate it very much if you were my best man. Albus is going to be the maid of honor and I was thinking too that Harry and Ginny could be the ring bearer and flower girl." Hee hee...I crack myself up. Really, I suck at finding foreshadowing the first time around. After I read something all the way through, then I can spot it...*sigh* But I loved everything that went on here, from Harry and Sev's playful banter at the beginning of the chapter to the mini-argument at the end. It was perfect. And if my befuddled mind could concentrate for on one thing for more than ten seconds, I'd write more on that. Perhaps the Yahoo board will be of some assistance this weekend. I'm glad that you overcame your illness and pumped this puppy out in two days, which is absolutely amazing. Thanks for keeping us in hysterics with your lovely spoiler too. This is so perfect and I can't wait to see what comes of everything in the next chapter! (Oh, just wanted to add how fitting the chapter title and tagline were. I found myself continually thinking back to it, saying, "Yup, that's hollow." I'm floored.) Author's Response: Okay, PK! I was totally thinking bout Princess Bride when I wrote that part! I lurve that movie. Hee hee. I think this story is all about opposites. Finding the balance, as you so nicely put it. Harry and Severus have been through so much and now it's finally time to let the past go but that is going to be much harder than it sounds, especially with everything that is waiting to plague our gentlemen. *sigh* Voldy's body was planned to end up that way but you'll have wait and see next chapter. Severus was expecting it, though not quite like that. LOL Scrimgeour (unfortunately IS coming up). I don't like that man. I must say, the pychiatrist's hat looks good on you! LOL And yes, the friction is not going to end too soon. Both of our boys are waaaay too keyed up to be normal and calm right now, Severus as much as Harry. And Harry as well is finally getting the chance to live the life of a normal teenager without Voldemort looming over him. He's going to be acting out, whether he realizes it or not. And Severus (again with the balance) is still struggling to figure out what it means to be a father to an adolescent out of nowhere. And as I said to someone else, I think Sev has a tendency to treat Harry much like he did Lily, as very fragile and he's indulgent. He rarely calls Harry on anything...even the whole Pinth episode, he only actually reprimanded Harry because Harry was waiting for it. He'd rather just shoulder all the blame for the present becasue of his guilt of the past. Whew, how is that for psychology? LOL And yes, Harry is going to worry about their relationship and what it means now that Voldy is gone. Poor boys...they need help! Remus is up next, along with Ginny and Ron and Hermione. And I am hoping to finish a remus/tonks tidbit as well. Very excited! Don't be too hard on yourself with the foreshadowing. LOL You'll get it. :o) Glad you liked the good times and the bad. More is up, I promise and though it kills me to write it, I love a tetchy Sev and a grouchy Harry. Hee hee. I just like friction. My mom says I have a sickness. :oP I am well into chapter 2. I think I'm into a whole level of obsession. YAY! I'm so glad you got the chapter title. It was a fun one. Play on the Godric's Hollow but all the feeling of being hollow. YAY! Love ya, PK! Glad you enjoyed and thanks for the awesome reveiw and where, may I ask is you next chapter. *snape glare* :o)
You managed to hold my attention throughout this whole chapter, and it was as if I'd sunk into the word of LC and could never get out again. ;) People kept bugging me while I was reading, and I continued to snap at them and brush them away, because it was torture being torn away from the screen. I have a ton of favorite moments, it seems, but my very favorite, and I've mentioned this to you, but I absolutely adored the protectiveness of Severus and Harry for each other. The scene where Harry puts on his cap without question is just perfect and speaks volumes about how far he's come. I love that Harry is sixteen and still listens to his dad about doing such simple things as keeping warm. He probably didn't even realize he'd obeyed so quickly... The description of the two of them kneeling in the snow together was beautiful and vivid. I could definitely feel the cold in this chapter, but of course I felt the warmth in the midst of it...lol. Of course! I mean these two are pretty much adorable...which doesn't really seem to fit for Severus Snape, but I don't know how else to describe it. ;) The scene with Rita Skeeter just made me want to rip her head off, and I loved the image of her 'lipsticked' teeth...I could just imagine her squirming out of the crowd and lunging for the discarded newspaper like her life depended on it. And Severus' protection of Harry during that scene just made me melt...the way he shoved Harry behind him and shielded him from whatever was coming. Kind of reminded me of the unconscious 'soccer mom arm' in the car sort of thing that my older sister seems to do to everyone in the passenger seat when she makes a sudden stop. *shrugs* lol. Oh, oh, oh...the last line of this chapter made me shiver a little. How could Severus say something so softly, yet still be so intimidating? I love that they are quarreling like a father and son, and maybe I'm awful for saying this, but I can't wait for some more... I appreciate that Severus treats Harry like a mature teenager, but he still doesn't tolerate his son's disrespect, even if it's filled with concern for his sleep-deprived father. Can we have a small lecture-type scene in the next chapter? Pretty please? I love me a strict Sev. *clicks heels* Good lord above, I can't wait until you write the next chapter. I love this just as much as I loved LC, and now that I'm sensing some calming, everyday, father/son interaction, I could just squeal with joy...lol. Brilliant job, Tabitha. *applauds* Author's Response: LOL That DID sound disgusting. :oP And you know I was pretty amazed as well. It took me a whole week to recover from being sicke but then really only 2 days to write the chapter. My muses were just ready, I guess. *shrug* LOL I'm glad I got you all dragged into my little LC world again. It's fun. And this chapter particularly so. Not really sure why except I really like cranky Harry. Hee hee. And I hate it when people interrupt me! Harry and Severus are very protective of each other which manifests itself in humorous and touching ways as Harry tries to keep the vultures from attacking his dad and then not so fluffy as it comes out that Severus didn't sleep. Harry's already cranky and it doesn't help that he's worried about his dad not taking care of himself. And Sev's not used to anyone caring about him, so it's bound to create tension, but we all know I love tension. :oP It's funny that you noticed Harry putting on his cap when Severus told him to. Some of those things between them are just automatic now and I think Harry too is used to just doing as he's told where Severus Snape is concerned. Hee hee. Oh and I think this Severus is pretty adorable. He's like dad of the year or something. And it's not even OOC for this one because of his background in this world. Just finding who he was when he was with Lily. He treats Harry sorta the same way he treated Lily. As something fragile. And he's very indulgent with Harry as well. It would have been much easier to really lay into Harry at then end there and even in the middle when Harry was being a grouch, but he doesn't. He hold it together. We'll see how long that will last. LOL ( I love the imagery of the soccer mom arm--i do that too and sometime, there's only my purse in the front seat!) Severus is rather intimidating, isn't he? I love it. They are beginning to settle into familiarity with each other and coming off all that has happened to them, there are bound to be promblems between them. Don't worry, we will have a lecture. And likely not only one throughout this story. Sev's in for a ride. ;o) I love me a strict Sev as well. YAY Squeal away, Jade. You are awesome and thanks for the lovely review and again for going over the chapter for me. :o) *bows in acceptance of your applause*
could you please resize the banner so it is smaller? on my computer, the big banner forces the page to be so wide that the text goes off the edges,so i have to scroll to read every line - very annoying :( Author's Response: Is the banner better now? I'm glad you liked the first chapter. Thanks so much for reviewing and hope you continue to enjoy. :o) |
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