You should write more often! :) Thanks for sharing, glad Harry is happy.
"Snape was a freak too!" I laughed out loud at that! This story was very cute and fluffy but that's how I like it. Well done on an adorable story! :D
poor harry but very nice *S*
I really couldn’t keep reading although it seemed like it might have had a lot of potential. It fails in a few areas though:
1-Your grammar. You don’t seem to like commas very much and you have a mixture of run on sentences, choppy sentences and ill placed semi-colons.
2-Formating Your formatting is also all over the place. The periods are supposed to be at the end of the last word of the sentence and on the same line, they shouldn’t be floating on the next line. On another note of punctuation; you’re quotes need to be “like this” you have the quotes “like “ or sometimes on the next line. Your word processor shouldn’t be doing that in less you are forcing it to or using word pad, you really need to proof read.
3-Quotes Besides what I mentioned about the quotes already; ((“Was she a freak like me?” “Can you tell me about her?” Harry interrupted.)) This is an incorrect way to use quotes and you do it a lot. You shouldn’t have quotes right next to each other from the same speaker; you need to either combined or put something in the middle of the two quotes.
I hope you don’t take this the wrong way but I think you really need to be more careful in your writing and then run it through a Beta reader. A lot of these are silly mistakes but it makes the reader think you didn’t spend time on your story and dismiss it. Good luck on future stories.
Author's Response: You didnt have to read it, but whatever,I wrote this for fun and if you didnt enjoy it, Well it doesnt matter, thanks for reviewing anyway
aaww very cute
Author's Response: Thanks I'm glad you liked it
Title: Lost and Found
| 19 Sep 2011 4:53 pm
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Reviewer: Fmh (Signed)
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Thank you lovely piece of writing
Author's Response: You welcome thanks for reading
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